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God forbid this thing format correctly anymore. :( It was a good time anyway.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
In Love
Yesterday I met you at the rink to pick up the babies since our schedules are cutting it pretty close. We made the exchange without incident and I decided that I would take the boys into the rink since Gavin was little fussy about just changing cars with no payoff. When we went inside you pushed your sunglasses up on top of your head and something about your face was lit up. I was looking at the girl I started dating 15 years ago. I know a lot of pressure is off of us with Paramedic school being over and all. I don't know what it is but I miss you so much right now. I want to call you but I know you are probably sleeping. I guess I am trying to say that this feels like one of those moments where our relationship has entered a new stage and I can feel it all around us, and its nice. I am more in love with you than I ever thought possible. My partner, my heart, my friend. I love you.Mike
Saturday, October 27, 2007
What a Bargain
My father-in-law recently sent me this email that breaks down the cost of a child and why they are so worth it and I sobbed while reading it. Enjoy.
I have repeatedly seen the breakdown of the cost of raising a child, but this is the first time I have seen the rewards listed this way. It's nice.
The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition .
But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:
* $8,896.66 a year,
· $741.38 a month, or
* $171.08 a week.
* That's a mere $24.24 a day!
* Just over a dollar an hour.
Still, you might think the best financial advice is don't have children if you want to be "rich."
Actually, it is just the opposite. What do you get for your $160,140?
* Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
* Glimpses of God every day.
* Giggles under the covers every night.
* More love than your heart can hold.
* Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
* Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
* A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
* A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites
* Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.
For $160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to:
* finger-paint,
* carve pumpkins,
* play hide-and-seek,
* catch lightning bugs, and
You have an excuse to:
* keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
* watching Saturday morning cartoons,
going to Disney movies, and
* wishing on stars.
* You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths hand prints set in clay and cards with backward letters.
For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
* taking the training wheels off a bike,
* removing a splinter,
* filling a wading pool,
* coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream or pizza regardless.
You get a front row seat to history, to witness the:
* first step,
* first word,
* first bra,
* first date, and
* first time behind the wheel.
You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits. So, one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!!
ENJOY YOUR CHILDREN!!
I have repeatedly seen the breakdown of the cost of raising a child, but this is the first time I have seen the rewards listed this way. It's nice.
The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition .
But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:
* $8,896.66 a year,
· $741.38 a month, or
* $171.08 a week.
* That's a mere $24.24 a day!
* Just over a dollar an hour.
Still, you might think the best financial advice is don't have children if you want to be "rich."
Actually, it is just the opposite. What do you get for your $160,140?
* Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
* Glimpses of God every day.
* Giggles under the covers every night.
* More love than your heart can hold.
* Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
* Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
* A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
* A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites
* Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.
For $160,140, you never have to grow up. You get to:
* finger-paint,
* carve pumpkins,
* play hide-and-seek,
* catch lightning bugs, and
You have an excuse to:
* keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
* watching Saturday morning cartoons,
going to Disney movies, and
* wishing on stars.
* You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths hand prints set in clay and cards with backward letters.
For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
* retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
* taking the training wheels off a bike,
* removing a splinter,
* filling a wading pool,
* coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream or pizza regardless.
You get a front row seat to history, to witness the:
* first step,
* first word,
* first bra,
* first date, and
* first time behind the wheel.
You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren and great grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications, and human sexuality that no college can match.
In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there under God. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits. So, one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!!
ENJOY YOUR CHILDREN!!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Part Deux
This second child has nearly brought me to tears. He is inconsolable at times. I am humbled by the fact that my parents had 6 children. I am almost at a loss for words to describe how frustrating and sad it is when you cannot console your baby. Lately, nothing seems to work. It is an incredible testament to their love of us children that they kept having more. They wanted 8! They by no means had an easy life. My father was working 16 hour days so my mother had to be the 24/7 baby caregiver. I am amazed she wanted to do it even twice let alone 6 times. Mom I love you and appreciate you that much more.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
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Monday, August 27, 2007
Should I die tomorrow read this.
"After the first death, there is no other," wrote Dylan Thomas. That doesn't mean the ones that come after won't break your heart, but it's the first that punches your soul's passport. Welcome, fellow human, to a different country than the one you woke up to this morning. The air's different here; so is the scenery. Your knees don't work so well; in fact, you may want to fall to them.
For a precious little while, you are allowed to be stunned into silence, or to shriek, or to talk—recounting stories of who he was, what she meant to you, and how it all came to an end. Tell those stories. Some people may try to enforce "The Rules," to wit: Enough of This Drama Is Enough. Ignore them. Besides, if you treat yourself gently and take the time you need, someday soon you'll hear the faint but steady voice of your own good sense. Play music you love, sit in the sunshine if you can find some, and if anyone offers you a hand, hold it. Let them feed the cat, too, because they want to be useful. If your good sense does not kick in on its own, help it along: scramble some eggs. It will feel strange at first. But if you pretend that scrambling eggs is normal, eventually it will become normal. Soon you can squeeze some orange juice, too.
For some of us the stay in this new country seems endless. But time passes, seasons change, and, truly, would those we grieve for want us to mope? Come with me, back into the world. We'll return to this land someday, all too soon, but in the meantime the garden needs weeding, the bills need paying. Your other loved ones need you. And you, my sweet friend, you could use a shampoo.
—Larkin Warren
I don't quite know why I posted this, but just in case I am honored to have been the one to have punched your passport. (knowhwatimsayin) ;)
For a precious little while, you are allowed to be stunned into silence, or to shriek, or to talk—recounting stories of who he was, what she meant to you, and how it all came to an end. Tell those stories. Some people may try to enforce "The Rules," to wit: Enough of This Drama Is Enough. Ignore them. Besides, if you treat yourself gently and take the time you need, someday soon you'll hear the faint but steady voice of your own good sense. Play music you love, sit in the sunshine if you can find some, and if anyone offers you a hand, hold it. Let them feed the cat, too, because they want to be useful. If your good sense does not kick in on its own, help it along: scramble some eggs. It will feel strange at first. But if you pretend that scrambling eggs is normal, eventually it will become normal. Soon you can squeeze some orange juice, too.
For some of us the stay in this new country seems endless. But time passes, seasons change, and, truly, would those we grieve for want us to mope? Come with me, back into the world. We'll return to this land someday, all too soon, but in the meantime the garden needs weeding, the bills need paying. Your other loved ones need you. And you, my sweet friend, you could use a shampoo.
—Larkin Warren
I don't quite know why I posted this, but just in case I am honored to have been the one to have punched your passport. (knowhwatimsayin) ;)
Thursday, July 12, 2007
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Just a note
Digging a hole in the dirt in the back yard with tiny shovels.
Watching the ants bustle about.
Getting a little too close and realising that they bite.
A feeling of trepidation when a bug decides to use your skin as a sidewalk.
Kicking a ball with dad inside the house for15 minutes on end.
Amazement at seeing that Trinity can roll over on command.
Using a cardboard tube as a megaphone.
Morning hugs and tender pats on the back.
Climbing out of the crib at nonnies house for the first time.
Correctly stating "it's raining" when stepping out into the rain.
These are a few things you have done just in the last couple weeks. I am amazed at how quickly it goes. Daddy is quite impressed with you.
Watching the ants bustle about.
Getting a little too close and realising that they bite.
A feeling of trepidation when a bug decides to use your skin as a sidewalk.
Kicking a ball with dad inside the house for15 minutes on end.
Amazement at seeing that Trinity can roll over on command.
Using a cardboard tube as a megaphone.
Morning hugs and tender pats on the back.
Climbing out of the crib at nonnies house for the first time.
Correctly stating "it's raining" when stepping out into the rain.
These are a few things you have done just in the last couple weeks. I am amazed at how quickly it goes. Daddy is quite impressed with you.
Tuesday, May 01, 2007
Melted
Gavin,
Lately I have been trying to put you to bed as much as possible because 3 nights out of the week I am not home to do so due to school. When I do it is always the same routine. I read you a story in the glider and then I give you a kiss and put you to bed. Sometimes in the middle of the night you will wake up crying like you had a bad dream, and I will get up and sing to you Neenah Dodo and rock you to calm you down and lay you back down so you can go back to sleep. Last night you were a little fussy when I was putting you to bed even tho it was about an hour past your bedtime so after I read you your story and picked you up to put you to bed you were squirming and fussing a bit. I hugged you close and swayed for a few seconds and you calmed down. I was just thinking how nice it is when you lay your head on my shoulder and hug me when you started to sing. Neenah - Dodo, Neenah - Dodo, something unintelligible, Neenah - Dodo, Neenah - Dodo. My heart melted right out of my chest, and I swayed to your little serenade until you started sucking your thumb - clearly ready to lay down for sleepy. I caught my breath and wiped my teary eyes and gave you one last hug before I laid you down. I love you big boy.
-Daddy
Lately I have been trying to put you to bed as much as possible because 3 nights out of the week I am not home to do so due to school. When I do it is always the same routine. I read you a story in the glider and then I give you a kiss and put you to bed. Sometimes in the middle of the night you will wake up crying like you had a bad dream, and I will get up and sing to you Neenah Dodo and rock you to calm you down and lay you back down so you can go back to sleep. Last night you were a little fussy when I was putting you to bed even tho it was about an hour past your bedtime so after I read you your story and picked you up to put you to bed you were squirming and fussing a bit. I hugged you close and swayed for a few seconds and you calmed down. I was just thinking how nice it is when you lay your head on my shoulder and hug me when you started to sing. Neenah - Dodo, Neenah - Dodo, something unintelligible, Neenah - Dodo, Neenah - Dodo. My heart melted right out of my chest, and I swayed to your little serenade until you started sucking your thumb - clearly ready to lay down for sleepy. I caught my breath and wiped my teary eyes and gave you one last hug before I laid you down. I love you big boy.
-Daddy
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
My wife in quotes
There is in every true woman's heart a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity; but which kindles up, and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity.
-- Washington Irving (1783-1859) American Writer
To be capable of steady friendship or lasting love, are the two greatest proofs, not only of goodness of heart, but of strength of mind.
-- William Hazlitt (1778-1830) English Essayist
Class is an aura of confidence that is being sure without being cocky. Class has nothing to do with money. Class never runs scared. It is self-discipline and self-knowledge. It's the sure footedness that comes with having proved you can meet life.
-- Ann Landers, born 1918
No matter who says what, you should accept it with a smile and do your own work.
-- Mother Teresa (1910-1997) Albanian Missionary
Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.
-- A.W. Pinero
-- Washington Irving (1783-1859) American Writer
To be capable of steady friendship or lasting love, are the two greatest proofs, not only of goodness of heart, but of strength of mind.
-- William Hazlitt (1778-1830) English Essayist
Class is an aura of confidence that is being sure without being cocky. Class has nothing to do with money. Class never runs scared. It is self-discipline and self-knowledge. It's the sure footedness that comes with having proved you can meet life.
-- Ann Landers, born 1918
No matter who says what, you should accept it with a smile and do your own work.
-- Mother Teresa (1910-1997) Albanian Missionary
Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young.
-- A.W. Pinero
Monday, April 02, 2007
Dear Lord
Dear Lord,
I know we don't talk much anymore, but I know you always listen to me when I call. I just wanted you to know how much this family you have given me means to me. I tell you this a lot, but I just needed to write it down. I am trying my best to take care of them and do what is right. My little boy bows his head to pray before we eat, and he puts a smile on any face he meets. He truly is a treasure. If you took him home tomorrow I would be a better man for having had him. My wife is a blessing without end. I definitely don't deserve her, but I do try to make up for the discrepancy. She is carrying our second child now and I am equally amazed at how the whole process works. I know I don't deserve all that you have done and continue to do so I just wanted to say thanks.
Love,
Mike
I know we don't talk much anymore, but I know you always listen to me when I call. I just wanted you to know how much this family you have given me means to me. I tell you this a lot, but I just needed to write it down. I am trying my best to take care of them and do what is right. My little boy bows his head to pray before we eat, and he puts a smile on any face he meets. He truly is a treasure. If you took him home tomorrow I would be a better man for having had him. My wife is a blessing without end. I definitely don't deserve her, but I do try to make up for the discrepancy. She is carrying our second child now and I am equally amazed at how the whole process works. I know I don't deserve all that you have done and continue to do so I just wanted to say thanks.
Love,
Mike
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Gavin
I am in the home stretch of a 36 hour shift right now and I just got off the phone with mommy as she was rocking you to sleep. I talked to you and you giggled which melted my heart. I miss you so much. I have been wearing the rubberband you left on the Coke machine yesterday on my wrist. When I look at it I think of you and I smile. I have clinical time tomorrow morning at the hospital, but I may just leave early so I can see you and mommy. I miss you guys so much, and it's hard to be away from you when I am getting paid let alone when I am not getting paid. Stupid clinical time.
I printed out the application for the town where your Uncle Robert is a police officer since it doesn't look very promising here in C town. I am number 10 on the list and I will be dropping 5 spots because I am not a medic nor do I have a degree. I do have plenty of college credits, but no degree. Don't worry tho I will make it on someplace, and that will probably be a good thing if it isn't here in C town.
I love and miss you!
Daddy
I printed out the application for the town where your Uncle Robert is a police officer since it doesn't look very promising here in C town. I am number 10 on the list and I will be dropping 5 spots because I am not a medic nor do I have a degree. I do have plenty of college credits, but no degree. Don't worry tho I will make it on someplace, and that will probably be a good thing if it isn't here in C town.
I love and miss you!
Daddy
Friday, March 23, 2007
Unity
Lori,
I enjoy getting to know the person you are more and more every year. Thank you for being my perfect match. After 14 years you still amaze me. Your grace, beauty and gentle spirt are the envy of every man I know. You have the presence to soften the most bitter heart, and the loyalty to make the truest friends. Your have the grace and compassion of a queen. It is my greatest honor and deepest humilty that you chose to marry me. Thank you for all you are and for all we have become together. You make me want to be a better man. Plus you make cute kids. :)
I love you more today than yesterday,
Mike
I enjoy getting to know the person you are more and more every year. Thank you for being my perfect match. After 14 years you still amaze me. Your grace, beauty and gentle spirt are the envy of every man I know. You have the presence to soften the most bitter heart, and the loyalty to make the truest friends. Your have the grace and compassion of a queen. It is my greatest honor and deepest humilty that you chose to marry me. Thank you for all you are and for all we have become together. You make me want to be a better man. Plus you make cute kids. :)
I love you more today than yesterday,
Mike
Monday, March 19, 2007
Thursday, November 16, 2006
The Sweetest Wakeup
Little Boy,
Yesterday reminded me of when I was a little boy. When I was little my daddy worked a lot too. My daddy was tired all the time. He used to come home late at night and my mommy would keep us up so we could see him. (Sound familiar?) We would sit on the recliner with him and watch Dr. Who. Your Uncle Robert would sit on my daddies lap and I would sit on his shoulders, and sometimes I would fall asleep. I liked to fall asleep because my daddy would carry me upstairs and put me to bed give me a kiss and tell me he loves me. One time my daddy had to work third shift. Thats late at night when everyone is sleeping. So when my daddy was sleeping during the day my mommy would want us to be very quiet so we wouldn't wake him up because she said he would get angry. The funny thing was that if I came in his room and woke him up he would always hug and kiss me and smile. I don't think I ever understood why he wasn't angry with me until yesterday.
You don't know it because you are too little, but I haven't gotten a lot of sleep in the last couple months because of classes and work so I am tired a lot. Yesterday I had about 30 minutes before I had to go to class so I took a nap on the couch while you were napping upstairs. About 15 minutes into my nap Aunt Nancy came over to watch you so I could go to class and you had woken up so she got you and brought you downstairs. She was going to take you into the kitchen to eat I think, but you broke free and sprinted towards me. I must have heard the little footsteps because I started opening my eyes just as you headbutted me. I was jarred awake only to see you with one tiny hand on your forehead grinning and giggling. Now I understand why my daddy never minded me interrupting his sleep. It was still the sweetest little wakeup.
I love you so much
Love Daddy
Yesterday reminded me of when I was a little boy. When I was little my daddy worked a lot too. My daddy was tired all the time. He used to come home late at night and my mommy would keep us up so we could see him. (Sound familiar?) We would sit on the recliner with him and watch Dr. Who. Your Uncle Robert would sit on my daddies lap and I would sit on his shoulders, and sometimes I would fall asleep. I liked to fall asleep because my daddy would carry me upstairs and put me to bed give me a kiss and tell me he loves me. One time my daddy had to work third shift. Thats late at night when everyone is sleeping. So when my daddy was sleeping during the day my mommy would want us to be very quiet so we wouldn't wake him up because she said he would get angry. The funny thing was that if I came in his room and woke him up he would always hug and kiss me and smile. I don't think I ever understood why he wasn't angry with me until yesterday.
You don't know it because you are too little, but I haven't gotten a lot of sleep in the last couple months because of classes and work so I am tired a lot. Yesterday I had about 30 minutes before I had to go to class so I took a nap on the couch while you were napping upstairs. About 15 minutes into my nap Aunt Nancy came over to watch you so I could go to class and you had woken up so she got you and brought you downstairs. She was going to take you into the kitchen to eat I think, but you broke free and sprinted towards me. I must have heard the little footsteps because I started opening my eyes just as you headbutted me. I was jarred awake only to see you with one tiny hand on your forehead grinning and giggling. Now I understand why my daddy never minded me interrupting his sleep. It was still the sweetest little wakeup.
I love you so much
Love Daddy
Thursday, September 14, 2006
I will follow you into the dark...
Lori,
I just wanted to write you a little note to tell you how much I love you. I know work and school has been kind of crazy with all the time it takes up, and I know it won't get any better once I start my clinical time, but I am thankful for the time it has taken me away from you because I realize just how much I love you in my life. I realize, not only how much I need you, but how much I enjoy your company. I guess time and routine has a way of dulling the senses to the incredible blessings we have in our lives. You are one of those blessings to me, and I thank God that I can live the only life I have with you, and given the chance I would do it all again. You are and have always been the only girl for me, and I hope I tell you that enough. I was listening to the radio on my way to work today and this song came on the radio, and I thought of you and cried. I don't know if I am just stressed out of on my period or what, but I do know one thing. I love you as much as any man has ever loved any woman on this earth.
Mike
I just wanted to write you a little note to tell you how much I love you. I know work and school has been kind of crazy with all the time it takes up, and I know it won't get any better once I start my clinical time, but I am thankful for the time it has taken me away from you because I realize just how much I love you in my life. I realize, not only how much I need you, but how much I enjoy your company. I guess time and routine has a way of dulling the senses to the incredible blessings we have in our lives. You are one of those blessings to me, and I thank God that I can live the only life I have with you, and given the chance I would do it all again. You are and have always been the only girl for me, and I hope I tell you that enough. I was listening to the radio on my way to work today and this song came on the radio, and I thought of you and cried. I don't know if I am just stressed out of on my period or what, but I do know one thing. I love you as much as any man has ever loved any woman on this earth.
Mike
Thursday, August 10, 2006
Will you remember?
Will you remember the things I said,
when on mommies belly I'd rest my head?
Will you remember when I held you tight,
you fussed and kicked and cried all night?
Will you remember your first tooth,
we tried so hard to comfort you?
Will you remember falling on the foor,
and daddy bursting through the door?
Will you remember saying "dah" one day?
I didn't know you spoke that way.
Will you remember family hugs,
or how to talk just like the Pugs?
Mommies and Daddies cherish those days,
and hold them tight till we pass away.
Friday, August 04, 2006
I Love Gavin Huggies!
You are getting to be so loving lately. You will come over to me and I will say "Gavin give me huggies!" and you will smile real big and put your arms out for me to pick you up and you will give me the most wonderful hug and sometimes even kiss after kiss after kiss. Also lately when we tell you we love you it sounds like you are trying to say it back. You are growing up to be such a sweet and loving boy, your daddy and I love you so much!
Love, Mommy
Love, Mommy
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Heartache
Gavin,
I was so happy to see you this morning! You walked up the stairs by yourself - like mommy and I don't like you to do - and came walking into the bathroom with a big smile on your face to greet me. I gave you a hug and kiss and put you down, and you walked off as if you had more pressing things to attend to. I can't get over how quickly you are growing up. I know in your head you think you are big, but you are such a little boy. You gave mommy and I a big hug, like you do when all of our heads touch together, and you grab our necks. I will tell you a little secret, it melts our hearts when you hug us like that. But alas, daddies have to go to work so I left. When I got to work this morning I logged into my computer like normal. A folder was open on my desktop with some photographs in it and I clicked on one we took of you about a year ago. My heart began to ache. I longed for another neck hug and a smile, but I know I have to wait till I get home to get one. So I called mommy instead and she put you on the phone, and for the first time you actually started talking to me, "hah da" you said, followed quickly by some gibberish and some high pitched words in your Daisey voice and a tiny little "dahdie" as mommy got back on the phone. I absolutely loved our little conversation and I can't wait to get home to chase you around and try to decipher some more gibberish.
I love you,
Dahdie
I was so happy to see you this morning! You walked up the stairs by yourself - like mommy and I don't like you to do - and came walking into the bathroom with a big smile on your face to greet me. I gave you a hug and kiss and put you down, and you walked off as if you had more pressing things to attend to. I can't get over how quickly you are growing up. I know in your head you think you are big, but you are such a little boy. You gave mommy and I a big hug, like you do when all of our heads touch together, and you grab our necks. I will tell you a little secret, it melts our hearts when you hug us like that. But alas, daddies have to go to work so I left. When I got to work this morning I logged into my computer like normal. A folder was open on my desktop with some photographs in it and I clicked on one we took of you about a year ago. My heart began to ache. I longed for another neck hug and a smile, but I know I have to wait till I get home to get one. So I called mommy instead and she put you on the phone, and for the first time you actually started talking to me, "hah da" you said, followed quickly by some gibberish and some high pitched words in your Daisey voice and a tiny little "dahdie" as mommy got back on the phone. I absolutely loved our little conversation and I can't wait to get home to chase you around and try to decipher some more gibberish.
I love you,
Dahdie
Thursday, July 13, 2006
A Baby's Hug
We were the only family with children in the restaurant. I sat Gavin in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly sitting and talking. Suddenly, Gavin squealed with glee and said, "Hi." He pounded his fat baby hands on the high chair tray. His eyes were crinkled in laughter and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin, as he wriggled and giggled with merriment.
I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man whose pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map. We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled. His hands waved and flapped on loose wrists.
"Hi there, baby; hi there, big boy. I see ya, buster," the man said to Gavin
My husband and I exchanged looks, "What do we do?" Gavin continued to laugh and answer, "Hi."
Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby. Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, "Do ya patty cake?
Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek-a-boo."
Nobody thought the old man was cute. He was obviously drunk. My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for Gavin, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.
We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot.
The old man sat poised between me and the door. "Lord, just let me out of here before he speaks to me or Gavin," I prayed. As I drew closer to the man, I turned my back trying to sidestep him and avoid any air he might be breathing. As I did, Gavin leaned over my arm, reaching with both arms in a baby's "pick-me-up" position. Before I could stop him, Gavin had propelled himself from my arms to the man.
Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love and kinship.
Gavin in an act of total trust, love, and submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder. The man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor, cradled my baby's bottom and stroked his back. No two beings have ever loved so deeply for so short a time. I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Gavin in his arms and his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm commanding voice, "You take care of this baby."
Somehow I managed, "I will," from a throat that contained a stone.
He pried Gavin from his chest, lovingly and longingly, as though he were in pain. I received my baby, and the man said, "God bless you, ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift."
I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Gavin in my arms, I ran for the car. My husband was wondering why I was crying and holding Gavin so tightly, and why I was saying, "My God, my God, forgive me."
I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who was blind, holding a child who was not. I felt it was God asking, "Are you willing to share your son for a moment?" when He shared His for all eternity. The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, "To enter the Kingdom of God, we must become as little children."
This story was forwarded to me as a an email, but I was so touched by the little boy in the story and how closely it resembled Gavins bahavior at 15 months that I had to post it here.
If only we could keep these things in the forefront of our minds at all times.
I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man whose pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map. We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled. His hands waved and flapped on loose wrists.
"Hi there, baby; hi there, big boy. I see ya, buster," the man said to Gavin
My husband and I exchanged looks, "What do we do?" Gavin continued to laugh and answer, "Hi."
Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby. Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, "Do ya patty cake?
Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek-a-boo."
Nobody thought the old man was cute. He was obviously drunk. My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for Gavin, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.
We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot.
The old man sat poised between me and the door. "Lord, just let me out of here before he speaks to me or Gavin," I prayed. As I drew closer to the man, I turned my back trying to sidestep him and avoid any air he might be breathing. As I did, Gavin leaned over my arm, reaching with both arms in a baby's "pick-me-up" position. Before I could stop him, Gavin had propelled himself from my arms to the man.
Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love and kinship.
Gavin in an act of total trust, love, and submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder. The man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor, cradled my baby's bottom and stroked his back. No two beings have ever loved so deeply for so short a time. I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Gavin in his arms and his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm commanding voice, "You take care of this baby."
Somehow I managed, "I will," from a throat that contained a stone.
He pried Gavin from his chest, lovingly and longingly, as though he were in pain. I received my baby, and the man said, "God bless you, ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift."
I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Gavin in my arms, I ran for the car. My husband was wondering why I was crying and holding Gavin so tightly, and why I was saying, "My God, my God, forgive me."
I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who was blind, holding a child who was not. I felt it was God asking, "Are you willing to share your son for a moment?" when He shared His for all eternity. The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, "To enter the Kingdom of God, we must become as little children."
This story was forwarded to me as a an email, but I was so touched by the little boy in the story and how closely it resembled Gavins bahavior at 15 months that I had to post it here.
If only we could keep these things in the forefront of our minds at all times.
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